Resolved!

The Tucson Citizen has some advice:

U.S. Rep. Jim Kolbe: Resolve to take it easy. You deserve that after 22 years in that squirrel cage known as the U.S. House. Thanks for all you did and thanks for what you tried to do but were foiled.

Killing the penny? Keeping mobile immigration checkpoints out of Southern AZ?

U.S. Sen. John McCain: Resolve to say what you mean and mean what you say. You know the way you once did. Either that or resolve to start carrying around a Bible to further demonstrate your conservative credentials.

Screw that. Tell more drunken Irish jokes.

U.S. Rep. Raúl Grijalva: Resolve to quit smoking in January . . . and in March . . . and in May . . . pretty much every month with 31 days until it works.

Ding-Dongs, man. It worked for Steve Dallas.

U.S. Rep.-elect Gabrielle Giffords: Resolve to never be photographed with Ted Kennedy or John Kerry because that would be the kiss of death in Cochise County in 2008.

Or make sure you look really, really, reallllllly bored. Like this:

Kerry mccain

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